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#1
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"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper.""What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!""I know all that.""Then, why did you invite a friend for supper?"authentic Miami Heat jerseysMiami Heat jerseys storeMiami Heat"Because the poor guy is thinking about getting married."
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#2
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LAW 4: Golf balls never bounce off of trees back into play. If one does, the tree is breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.LAW 5: No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all his playing partners must solemnly chant "You looked up," or invoke the wrath of the universe.LAW 6: The higher a golfer's handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instuctor.UGG Australia Women's Highkoo amber brown 5765[/b]UGG Australia Women's Corinth cocoa 5596[/b]UGG Australia Women's Elsey black 5596[/b]LAW 7: Every par-three hole in the world has a secret desire to humiliate golfers. The shorter the hole, the greater its desire.LAW 8: Topping a 3-iron is the most painful torture known to man.LAW 9: Palm trees eat golf balls.
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#3
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"You've just had your twelvth baby miss. What are you going to name this one?""Phil""But you named the last eleven phil""Yeah its great. I say phil go clean the room, they all go clean their room. I say phil come for dinner, they all come for dinner."UGG Boots Classic Crochet 5833 OatmealWhite UGG Boots Classic Crochet 5833Black Ugg Boots Classic Mini 5854"But what if you only want one of them?""Oh! Then I call them by thier last name."
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#4
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No other guy stood a chance when Dan attended the local dance,For when the girls danced with our Danny,His tool kept tickling round their fanny.The girls began to faint and swoon as Danny waltzed them round the room,But what a shock they had in stall,For one night dancing round the hall,Danny stopped and loudly cursed,He?d felt the string and strapping burst.Before he?d reached the nearest seat, his tool was dangling at his feet,chocolate UGG HandbagGrey UGG HandbagPink UGG HandbagA girl named Silvia made Dan sick for she gave his tool a spiteful kick,Poor Danny?s screams ran round the hall,For the string was tied round one of his balls.Of course by now the band was crackers,While in the gents Dan bathed his knackers.So if you?re like poor Daniel Morgan,And have a tiny sexual organ,Remember though it?s only wee,It?s always good enough, just to Pee!!
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